Episode 1: The Lost Turnabout

 

Phoenix:           ...*huff*...*huff*...

                        Grr!!  How did I get into this mess...?

 

     That’s far enough!

You can’t run forever, Mr. Phoenix Wright!

 

Phoenix:           Wha...!? 

                        What have I done wrong!?

 

I cannot allow you to go on like this!

 

Phoenix:           ...?

                         B-but I’m just a simple defense attorney!

 

Silence!

You are no longer worthy of your title!

 

[whoosh!]

 

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September 8, 9:08 AM

District Court

Defendant Lobby No. 1

 

Phoenix:           What a nightmare...

                        And I bet it was this ringtone that caused it...

                        I really shouldn’t be dozing off right before a trial starts anyway...

 

Phone:             ...*beep*...

 

Phoenix:           Huh... looks like they hung up.

 

???:                  Ah, good. 

                        I finally found it.

 

[whack!]

 

???:                  Talk about a close call.

                        I hate to do this to you, but...

 

???:                  It's nothing personal... Mr. Attorney.

 

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A few minutes later...

District Court

Defendant Lobby No. 1

 

Phoenix:           ...

                        Ouch... My head... It's throbbing...

                        And why does it feel... so foggy in there...?

 

???:                  Gooood morning!

 

Phoenix:           Ack!

                        Uh... G-good morning...

 

???:                  What's wrong!?  You don't look well!

                        People are at their best first thing in the morning!  Where's that fighting spirit!?

 

Phoenix:           ...  Sorry, but can you please turn the cheeriness down?

                        My head... sort of hurts...

 

???:                  Roger that!

 

Phoenix:           ...

 

???:                  ...

 

Phoenix:           ...

                        Um... Am I in trouble or something?

 

???:                  Huh?  "Trouble...?"

 

Phoenix:           W-wait, never mind.  You're a policewoman, right?

                        I thought maybe I had done something wrong...?

 

???:                  Wh-what are you talking about?

                        I'm the one in trouble!

 

Phoenix:           ...  What?

 

Byrde:               I'm placing my life in your hands today, Mr. Phoenix Wright!

 

Phoenix:           Life... in... my hands...?

 

Byrde:               You promised me!  You said you would prove that I was not guilty!

 

Phoenix:           "N... Not... guilty"?

 

Byrde:               Just when I thought all hope was lost; when all the other lawyers had laughed me off...

                        "Leave it to me!" you said!  You!  The one and only Phoenix Wright came to save the day!

                        And just like that, I was moved to tears, sir!

                         I'll never forget what you're doing for me, EVER!

 

Phoenix:           (What is this girl babbling about...?)

 

Byrde:               Actually, I really love to watch court proceedings, and I always root for you to win!

                        When I'm off duty, I like to come here and...

                        ...?

                        What's wrong?  You've been acting really strange and you keep staring at me.

                        You're making me kind of nervous, sir...

 

Phoenix:           Oh... sorry.

                        (Hmm... I'm afraid to ask, but here goes...)

                        So, this might sound bad, but... uh... Who are you?

 

Byrde:               Whaaaaat!?

                        Mr. Wright!!  How can you say that!?

                        How can you do this to the fragile heart of a girl about to go on trial...?

                        You're absolutely horrible!

 

Phoenix:           No -- I mean, I didn't mean it like that!

 

Byrde:               Is this how a defense attorney treats his clients, sir!? 

I can't believe this!!

 

Phoenix:           No, it's just...

                         ...Well, I think you have the wrong person.

                        I'm...

 

Byrde:               Yes...!?  "I'm..."!?

 

Phoenix:           ...

                         ... I'm...  Who am I?  (Why am I drawing a blank...?)

 

Bailiff:               The trial will begin shortly.

                        Will the defendant and her lawyer please proceed to the courtroom immediately!

 

Byrde:               The trial's about to start!  I'm counting on you in there, OK?

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Phoenix:           (Hmm... I guess I must have amnesia...)

                        (Let's see...  What can I piece together...?)

                        (Hmm, from our conversation, I can safely say that I'm probably a defense attorney.)

                        (And that girl...  I said I'd prove her "not guilty"...)

                        (I can't believe I made such an irresponsible promise.)

 

Phoenix:           Aaaaaargh!  Someone, please!!

                        Tell me this is just a bad dream!

 

Phoenix:           (Why do I get the feeling this is one dream I won't be waking up from...? *gulp*)

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

September 8, 10:00 AM

District Court

Courtroom No. 2

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Court is now in session for the trial of Maggey Byrde.

 

Payne:              The prosecution is ready, Your Honor.

 

Phoenix:           ...

 

Judge:               What is it, Mr. Wright?

 

Phoenix:           Um, er...  Are you talking to me...?

 

Judge:               Do you see any other defense attorneys here?

 

Phoenix:           (I guess not.  Urk.)

 

Judge:               Now then, are you ready?

 

---> No

 

Phoenix:           Um...

                                                What if I said, "No"?  Would that be alright?

 

Judge:               Of course it wouldn't!

 

Phoenix:           (Then why bother asking to begin with??)

 

---> Yes

 

Phoenix:           (I guess I should say, "Yes" for now.)

 

Judge:               Are you ready, Mr. Wright?

 

Phoenix:           Yes, Your Honor.

                                                (... Wait a sec...)

                                                (If her life is in my hands...)

                                                (I should really do the responsible thing...)

 

Phoenix:           Actually, you see, Your Honor...  My memory is kind of...

 

Judge:               The court will not hear the defense's excuses.

                        Because the defendant is a member of the police, this case is under great scrutiny.

                        Therefore, we must make this trial fair but swift.

                        I believe I have told you this before.  I hope you're not telling me you've forgotten!

 

Phoenix:           (Actually, I did...)

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Mr. Payne, your opening statement, please.

 

Payne:              Yes, Your Honor.

                        As I'm sure you're well aware, the defendant is accused of killing her lover.

                        What's worse, her lover was a fellow police officer!

 

Phoenix:           A policeman?  You did WHAT to a policeman!?

 

Byrde:               It wasn't me!

                        And besides, Dustin and I...

                        We weren't "lovers" like that!

 

Payne:              In any case...

                         The prosecution will prove that the guilty party is none other than the defendant!

 

Judge:               Very well.

                        Mr. Payne, please call your first witness.

 

Payne:              Hee, hee, hee. 

                         It's been a while, Mr. Wright.

                        Let's see what you've learned since last time.

                        I won't show you any mercy this time, rookie!

 

Phoenix:           Okaaay...

                        (And who are you again!?)

 

Payne:              Please bring Detective Dick Gumshoe to the stand.

 

Byrde:               Here we go!  Don't let me down, Mr. Wright!

 

Phoenix:           (Nowhere to hide...  I'm sooo dead...)

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Payne:              Witness, please state your name and occupation.

 

Gumshoe:         My name is Dick Gumshoe, sir.

                        I'm the detective in charge of homicides down at the precinct, sir.

 

Judge:               You don't look very well, Detective.

 

Gumshoe:         Well, sir, the defendant...  She works under me, so, you know...

 

Phoenix:           You work under that detective?

 

Byrde:               Yes, sir!  And while I was a trainee, he was always watching out for me, sir!

                        He's such a wonderful guy, sir!  I'll never forget what he's done for me!

 

Phoenix:           (OK, calm down, I believe you.)

 

Payne:              Detective Gumshoe.  Please describe for us the details of this murder.

 

Gumshoe:         Yes, sir.

                        It happened at the park near headquarters, "Expose Park".

                        The victim was one of the local cops, Dustin Prince.

                        He was pushed down from the benches on the upper path, sir.

                        The landing beat his body up bad and snapped his neck.

 

Payne:              The details are listed in the report that was distributed yesterday...

 

Judge:               Ah, yes.  The autopsy report, correct?

 

Phoenix:           (Why do I not remember getting a copy?)

 

Judge:               I see everything is in order here.

                        Even the estimated time of death is unusually well documented!

 

Gumshoe:         The victim's watch stopped from the impact of the landing, sir.

                        The results of the autopsy confirmed the time of death.

 

Payne:              If I may, Your Honor,

                        the prosecution would like to submit this photograph.

 

Judge:               Very well.  The court accepts it into evidence.

 

[Crime Photo 1 added to the Court Record.]

 

Judge:               Now then, I recall at yesterday's preliminary hearing,

                        a very important piece of evidence was brought to out attention.

 

Payne:              Yes, Your Honor.

 

Gumshoe:         Yes, sir.

 

Phoenix:           Yes... I guess?

 

Judge:               Mr. Wright!  Is your head on right today!?

                        There was a very crucial piece of evidence found under the victim's body!

 

Phoenix:           Um, was there?

 

Byrde:               Have you lost your mind!?

 

Phoenix:           Well, actually... 

                        Um, it's just nerves.  Give me a second.

 

Byrde:               Whaaaat!?

                        How can you talk like such an amateur!?  I thought you were a pro, sir!

                        ...

                        Alright, sir.  I'll help you through this!

                        At a time like this, maybe you ought to take a glance at the Court Record!

 

Phoenix:           ...Court Record?

 

Byrde:               Yup!  Info about evidence and people involved with this case are all listed there, sir!

                        You can look at the Court Record by touching the Court Record Button!

 

Phoenix:           The Court Record Button...?  You really know what you're talking about, huh?

 

Byrde:               It's too bad I'm a cop, right?  Just think!  I could totally be a legal aide instead!

 

Judge:               Mr. Wright.

 

Phoenix:           Yes, Your Honor!

 

Judge:               Court is in session.  Save your chit-chat for later!

 

Phoenix:           S-sorry, Your Honor...

 

Phoenix:           (Well, I guess I'd better check the Court Record and see what I can find...)

                        (What was it again?  The Court Record Button...?)

 

Judge:               Alright, Mr. Wright.  Let's see if your notes are in order.

 

Judge:               What was the piece of evidence found underneath the victim's body?

 

---> A wallet

 

Phoenix:           Um... I'm pretty sure it was a wallet...

 

Payne:              OBJECTION! 

This is a court of law!  You can't just make wild guesses!

 

Judge:               Agreed.

 

Byrde:               They're right, Mr. Wright!

                                                You have to check the Court Record before you answer!

                                                If you don't, your client might end up with a guilty verdict!

 

Phoenix:           ("Your client"?  You do realize that's you, right?)

 

Judge:               I will ask you one more time.

 

---> A police badge

 

Phoenix:           If he's a cop, then I guess maybe a badge or something...

 

Payne:              OBJECTION! 

Mr. Wright!  Please stick to the facts of this case!

 

Phoenix:           OBJECTION!

He is a policeman, correct?

 

Payne:              I don't think you understand the problem here.

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               I will not have an uninformed lawyer in my court.

 

Phoenix:           Yes, Your Honor.  (Guess there's no fooling those two.)

 

Byrde:               Please, for my sake, look at the Court Record, sir!

 

Phoenix:           (Uh, it's the Court Record Button, right?)

 

Judge:               I will ask you one more time.

 

---> Glasses

 

Phoenix:           That's simple, Your Honor.  A broken pair of glasses.

 

Judge:               That's right.

 

Gumshoe:         The victim grabbed the criminal's glasses as he was being shoved, sir,

and held onto them as he fell.

 

Phoenix:           ...

 

Byrde:               Hey!  Why are you giving me the evil eye!?

 

Phoenix:           Those glasses you're wearing...

 

Byrde:               Nnnngh...

                        Yes, this is my spare pair.

                        But these glasses they found at the scene of the crime are not mine!  I swear, sir!

 

Phoenix:           You sure about that?

 

Byrde:               Look, it was a coincidence that on that same day, I accidentally stepped on mine!

 

Phoenix:           (A "coincidence" she says...  Urk...)

 

Payne:              Eh hee hee hee hee hee hee!  Your Honor.

                        I have further evidence to present.

 

Judge:               Oh? You have more?

 

Payne:              And this evidence is very decisive.

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Very well!

                        Let's hear from out witness about this "evidence".

 

------------------------

 

WITNESS TESTIMONY

-- Decisive Evidence --

 

Gumshoe:         There's something even more incriminating than the glasses under the victim's body, sir.

                        During his date, the victim was pushed from the bench area.

                        But he managed to write the culprit's name on the ground where he landed.

                        I don't like saying it, but it was clearly the defendant's name, "Maggie", sir.

                        With this piece of evidence and the glasses, it's hard to say she's not the culprit.

 

------------------------

 

Payne:              This is a picture of the writing, Your Honor.

 

Judge:               Why, this is...!  Yes, I can see the name is clearly written here.

 

Payne:              The prosecution would like to submit this picture.

 

Judge:               Understood.  The court accepts it into evidence.

 

[Crime Photo 2 added to the Court Record.]

 

Phoenix:           As if the glasses alone didn't make you look suspicious,

                        the victim even wrote your name clear as day on the ground!

 

Byrde:               But, but, but, I already told you! Those glasses aren't mine!!

 

Phoenix:           And how do you explain his dying message?

 

Byrde:               ...

                        It's a conspiracy!  I'm not guilty, sir!

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Mr. Wright, you may cross-examine the witness.

 

Phoenix:           Cross-examine?

 

Byrde:               This is it!  I'm counting on you!

 

Phoenix:           Sure... But what am I supposed to do?

 

Byrde:               WHAT!?

                        This isn't like you at all!

                        Normally, this is the part where you get in the witnesses' faces!

 

Phoenix:           Get in their faces and do what?

 

Byrde:               I guess there's no way around it!

                        OK, I'm going to lend you a hand!

                        The prosecution's witnesses all hide things from the court,

which means they lie from time to time.

 

Phoenix:           Lie?

                        But... isn't that detective your superior?

 

Byrde:               Well, even if they don't mean to lie, sometimes people just remember things wrong.

 

Phoenix:           Hmm, like that detective.  He does sort of look like a scatterbrain...

 

Byrde:               It doesn't matter!  Either way, it's bad for us, sir!

                        That's why when you question witnesses, you have to find and expose their lies!

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Mr. Wright.  Your cross-examination, please.

 

Phoenix:           Y-yes, Your Honor.

 

Phoenix:           (Talk about trial by fire.  Here goes nothing.)

                        (As long as I can "expose the lies", we should be alright.)

 

------------------------

 

CROSS-EXAMINATION

-- Decisive Evidence --

 

Gumshoe:         There's something even more incriminating than the glasses under the victim's body, sir.

 

            ---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

Hmm, about those glasses...

                        Do you have any proof that those belong to my client?

 

Gumshoe:         The lenses are for near-sightedness, and are almost the same strength as her.

                        Even the frames look kinda like the ones she's wearing in her ID, pal.

 

Phoenix:           Hmm...  (What should I do now?)

 

---> Leave it be

 

Phoenix:           (We're in real trouble if those glasses really are hers...)

                                                (It's probably better to back out while we can.)

 

Byrde:               Argh... Why don't you believe me..?

 

---> Continue pressing

 

Phoenix:           Hold it!

                                                "Almost" and "kinda" are not good enough in a case like this!

 

Gumshoe:         Er, um...

 

Phoenix:           Do you have more definitive proof?

                                                Is there something that clearly links the defendant with those glasses!?

 

Gumshoe:         Er, um, uh...

                                                The dirt and sand rubbed out any traces of fingerprints or anything else.

 

Phoenix:           So what you are saying, detective,

                                                is that you have nothing that proves those glasses are my client's.

 

Gumshoe:         Um, something like that...

 

Payne:              Wh-wh-what!?

 

Judge:               I see... Hmm... So there is no proof...

 

Byrde:               Wow, that was amazing!

                                                I could totally feel it, down in my gut!

 

Gumshoe:         During his date, the victim was pushed from the bench area.

 

---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT! 

Now, you're sure he was pushed and that's how he fell?

 

Gumshoe:         Yeah, pal.  If you look at the wounds on the victim's body,

                        there's no way it was anything else.

 

Phoenix:           Hmm...

 

Judge:               Please continue with your testimony, detective.

 

Gumshoe:         Anyway, the victim fell pretty far...

 

Gumshoe:         But he managed to write the culprit's name on the ground where he landed.

 

---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT! 

The culprit's name?

 

Gumshoe:         Yeah.  I was surprised, too.

                        I didn't want to believe it, but...

 

Phoenix:           Was the name that of my client?

 

Gumshoe:         I don't like saying it, but it was clearly the defendant's name, "Maggie", sir.

 

---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT! 

Are you absolutely certain!?

 

Gumshoe:         Sorry, pal, but that's what it said.

                        This is a picture of it.  No matter which way you look, it still says "Maggie".

 

Phoenix:           (Hmm... He's got a point...)

 

Byrde:               Hey, hold on!

 

Phoenix:           Huh?

 

Byrde:               Don't "huh" me!  I know the picture says "Maggie", but...

 

Phoenix:           (Now that she mentions it, something does feel kind of off about this picture...)

 

Byrde:               That's how you know you found a contradiction!  Now hurry up and present some evidence!

 

Phoenix:           (So THAT'S what spotting a contradiction feels like...)

                        (I'd better check the Court Record again...)

             

Gumshoe:         With this piece of evidence and the glasses, it's hard to say she's not the culprit.

 

---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT! 

And you are certain that it was the victim who wrote the name on the ground?

 

Gumshoe:         There were scratches on his fingers from the rough sand,

                        and there were grains of sand stuck under his pointer finger nail.

 

Judge:               Hmm... It certainly seems that the name was written by the victim himself.

 

Phoenix:           (That didn't go well.)

                        (If it really was him, then we're in a lot of trouble...)

 

Byrde:               Don't give up!  Keep that fighting spirit going!

 

Phoenix:           I'm glad you're all pumped up, but...

 

Byrde:               I really want to see your "special move", sir!

 

Phoenix:           My what??

 

Byrde:               You always look so cool when you present evidence!

 

Phoenix:           Present... evidence?

 

---> Oh, THAT present evidence!

 

Phoenix:           Actually, I was just thinking about that!

 

Byrde:               Yes! The great Phoenix Wright is back!

                                                Oh, that's right!

 

Phoenix:           Huh?

 

Byrde:               I heard that lately, you can present not only evidence, but people's profiles as well!

                                                It sure makes things a bit more complicated, so be careful, sir!

 

Phoenix:           (People's profiles, huh?)

                                                (Alright, let's give this another try.)

 

---> Enlighten me

 

Phoenix:           Um, about this "presenting evidence"...

 

Byrde:               OK.  When you're listening to testimony, you can compare it with the Court Record.

                                                If you do that, you're sure to find contradictions in the witness's statements!

 

Phoenix:           C-contradictions?

 

Byrde:               Well, there are many reasons why a testimony might contradict the evidence.

                                                The witness might be lying, or maybe they're just mistaken.

 

Phoenix:           Uh huh.  And?

 

Byrde:               You still have no idea what I'm talking about??

                        When you find a contradiction, open the Court Record to the item you need...

 

Phoenix:           And then I present that evidence, right!?

 

Byrde:               You got it!

                                                You can also present people's profiles as evidence!

                                                With so many items, make sure you present the right thing!

 

Phoenix:           Hmm... Sounds complicated, but I'll give it a try.  You're pretty good at this.

 

Byrde:               Wow, being praised by a pro!  I don't know what to say!

 

Gumshoe:         I don't like saying it, but it was clearly the defendant's name, "Maggie", sir.

 

---> PRESENT: Maggey Byrde's Profile

 

Phoenix:           OBJECTION!

...

                        ...

                        ...

 

Judge:               Wh-what is it?

 

Phoenix:           ...

 

Phoenix:           (What... What's come over me...?)

                        (Without thinking, I just blurted out, "Objection!"...)

             

Phoenix:           (And I yelled it at the top of my lungs, finger outstretched, ready to take on my opponent!)

             

Phoenix:           (What a rush!)

 

Phoenix:           Detective Gumshoe!

 

Gumshoe:         Y-you talking to me, pal?

 

Phoenix:           Please state the defendant's name for me!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION! 

What are you trying to prove with this futile exercise, Mr. Wright?

 

Phoenix:           You'll see.  This is a very crucial line of questioning!

                        Actually, Mr. Payne, you can answer.  The defendant's name, if you please.

 

Payne:              Wh-where is this ridiculous question coming from?

                        The defendant's, uh, name is, uh... "Maggie Byrde".

 

Phoenix:           I think someone needs to check the Court Record.

 

Payne:              What...?  It says right here that it's "Maggey Byrde".

                        Aaaah!!

 

Phoenix:           It looks like the bird caught the cat napping!

 

Judge:               What's going on here!?

 

Gumshoe:         I have no idea either, sir!

 

Phoenix:           As you can see,

                        the victim did indeed leave a name, "Maggie".

                        However, the defendant's name is actually spelled "Maggey"!

 

Phoenix:           This is a blatant contradiction of facts!

 

Judge:               Ohh!

 

Gumshoe:         How about that?  I hadn't even noticed!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

But, but, but...!

                        But maybe the victim didn't know how to spell her name correctly...

 

Phoenix:           OBJECTION!

May I remind you that it was you who said,

                        "The defendant is accused of killing her lover."

                        If they were truly lovers, it would be impossible for him to have not known her name!

 

Payne:              Noooo!!

 

[courtroom murmuring]

 

Judge:               This is very true.

                        Mr. Payne.

 

Payne:              Y-yes, Your Honor?

 

Judge:               Are you absolutely certain that the defendant and the victim, Dustin Prince,

                        were, in fact, lovers?

 

Payne:              Y-yes, I am quite certain, Your Honor.

                        They were a well-known couple in the police force.

 

Judge:               Detective Gumshoe.

                        Please testify for the court the relationship between the victim and the defendant.

 

Gumshoe:         Yes, sir...

 

------------------------

 

WITNESS TESTIMONY

-- Dustin and Maggey --

 

Gumshoe:         Officer Prince and Officer Byrde had been going out for about half a year.

It sounded like they were even talking about marriage.

The day of the incident just happened to be the victim's birthday, sir.

Maggey... I mean, Officer Byrde, had gotten Officer Prince a present.

It was something she had gotten over 2 months ago.

I should know, 'cause she came to me to ask what she should get for him.

 

------------------------

 

Judge:               Oh... Those two sound like they were close...

 

Payne:              Nevertheless, tragedy struck.

 

Judge:               Hmm, yes, I see... You may cross-examine the witness, Mr. Wright.

 

------------------------

 

CROSS-EXAMINATION

-- Dustin and Maggey --

 

Gumshoe:         Officer Prince and Officer Byrde had been going out for about half a year.

 

---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

How do you know about this?

 

Gumshoe:         Every year in March, we have a training camp for us cops.

                        Officer Byrde was a rookie at the time, and she and Officer Prince seemed to hit it off.

 

Phoenix:           (They got close, I take it...)

 

Gumshoe:         Actually, I was supposed to go, too, but...

                        I couldn't pay the deposit for the trip, so I didn't.

                        If only I had gone on that trip...

 

Judge:               What is it?

 

Gumshoe:         Oh, uh, nothing, sir!  Really!  Anyway...

 

Gumshoe:         It sounded like they were even talking about marriage.

 

---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT! 

Marriage? But wasn't the victim 8 years older than her?

 

Gumshoe:         What!? You saying a guy's gotta marry someone the same age as himself, pal!?

 

Phoenix:           No, that's not what I meant at all...

 

Byrde:               Detective Gumshoe and Dustin were only a year apart, you know?

 

Phoenix:           (Ugh... I think this fella has a ways to go before marriage...)

 

Gumshoe:         Mind your own business, pal!

 

Gumshoe:         The day of the incident just happened to be the victim's birthday, sir.

 

---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT! 

The day of the incident... You mean September 6th?

 

Gumshoe:         Yeah.

                        The victim, Officer Prince, had just gotten off duty at 5:30 PM that day,

                         and since Maggey's night shift hadn't started yet, they went to the park for a bit...

 

Judge:               Ah, I remember when I was young and in love.  Oh, it was a jolly time.

 

Phoenix:           (That's great, Your Honor... I'm glad you're such a cheerful old man...)

 

Gumshoe:         Maggey... I mean, Officer Byrde, had gotten Officer Prince a present.

 

            ---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT! 

...You seem to know a lot about the defendant.

 

Gumshoe:         Well, that's because, uh, I'm her boss.  And I've gotta watch out for my subordinates!

 

Phoenix:           But even what she was going to give as a present?  Isn't that going a bit too far...?

 

Gumshoe:         Hey, pal!  Watch what you say!

                        I know everything that happens under me!  If someone so much as scratches their...

 

Phoenix:           I REALLY don't need to know that much...

 

Payne:              OBJECTION! 

Mr. Wright! Please refrain from badgering the witness!

 

Judge:               I agree.

                        Even if this witness has a crush on the defendant,

                        that should not be the point of discussion at this time.

 

Gumshoe:         Whoa!  Wait a second!  Why are we talking about this!?

                        It's all YOUR fault, pal! You're guilty, guilty, guilty!  I should have you arrested!

 

Phoenix:           (I think the good Detective is about done here...)

 

Gumshoe:         It was something she had gotten over 2 months ago.

 

---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT! 

"Over 2 months ago?"

 

Gumshoe:         Yup.  She's a very considerate woman, pal!

 

Phoenix:           So... What was this birthday present?

 

Gumshoe:         She got him a glove.

 

Judge:               A single glove?  Why would she only give him one?

 

Payne:              Um, actually, Your Honor, the glove in question is a baseball glove.

 

Judge:               Oh, I see.  A baseball glove.

 

Gumshoe:         Officer Prince was a huge baseball fan.

 

Phoenix:           (A baseball glove.  Hmm...)

 

---> Leave him be

 

Phoenix:           (Well, it's just a birthday present...)

 

Payne:              If there are no further questions, Your Honor...

 

Judge:               Hmm...

                                                Witness, why do you know about this glove?

 

---> Press further

 

Phoenix:           Just now, I believe you said that the present was something

                                                she had "gotten over 2 months ago".

 

Gumshoe:         Yeah.

 

Phoenix:           Are you saying she went out and bought the glove over 2 months ago?

 

Gumshoe:         Nah, nothing like that, pal!

 

Phoenix:           Then, what is it like?

 

Gumshoe:         She ordered it.  It was custom-made!

 

Phoenix:           Custom-made?  The glove was custom-made?

 

Gumshoe:         Yup, that's what I said!

 

Judge:               Hmm... So the glove was custom-made.

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

Your Honor, I really don't see how this glove is related to this case.

 

Judge:               Yes, it would seem that there is little relevance.  What do you think, Mr. Wright?

                        Do you think this glove is really relevant to this case?

 

            ---> Of course it’s not

 

                        Phoenix:           Hmm, I suppose it isn’t really relevant.

 

                        Judge:               Th-Then…

                                                Then why were you wasting this court’s time with irrelevant questions!?

 

                        Phoenix:           Uh, I was curious and got, uh, carried away, Your Honor…?

 

                        Judge:               Witness, please ignore this airheaded lawyer and continue with your testimony.

 

                        Payne:              Detective Gumshoe, please tell the court why you knew about the baseball glove.

 

---> Of course it's relevant

 

Phoenix:           (I don't know where this will lead me, but...)

 

Phoenix:           Of course it is relevant!

                                                That glove is the key to this whole case!

 

Byrde:               Yes!  Bluffing to the max!

                        Now, THIS is the Mr. Wright I know!

                        I'm so happy you're back, sir!  I was wondering how long it'd take!  This is great!

 

Phoenix:           (Hmm, pressing people... It feels like I've done this before.)

                                                (As if I used to do this to squeeze information from even the most tight-lipped people.)

 

                        [skip below]

 

Gumshoe:         I should know, 'cause she came to me to ask what she should get for him.

 

            ---> PRESS

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT! 

You discussed what the defendant was going to give to her boyfriend?

 

Gumshoe:         Well, I'm, er...  *ahem*  She, uh... trusts me, so...

 

Phoenix:           (Boy does he look proud of himself right now...)

 

Phoenix:           ...

 

Byrde:               Wh-what is it this time?

 

Phoenix:           That testimony didn't sound like it had any contradictions in it to me.

                        There just wasn't anything that really stuck out as odd.

 

Byrde:               Yeah...

                        I wonder what would happen if you tried to get more information from him?

 

Phoenix:           Get more information?

 

Byrde:               Yeah!  You know!  Like how they "press" people on those old cop shows, sir!

 

Phoenix:           So I should try "pressing" him, huh?

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Very well.

                        If you are that convinced, then let's hear some more about this matter.

 

Gumshoe:         Actually, I brought the glove with me today.

 

Phoenix:           And?

 

Judge:               Why didn't you say so earlier?  Hurry and show the glove to this court!

 

Gumshoe:         Well, I didn't think it had anything to do with this case...

                        Anyway, this is it, sir.

 

Judge:               It's, uh... rather yellow, isn't it?

 

[Baseball Glove added to the Court Record.]

 

Gumshoe:         Officer Prince really liked the color yellow.

 

Phoenix:           And that's why you had to special order it?

 

Byrde:               Yup, that's right!  That and one other reason...

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               I think this court has heard enough.

It is clear that the victim and the defendant were involved with each other.

 

Payne:              Yes, that's correct, Your Honor.

 

Judge:               Now, if that's true, it brings up an important question.

                        Was the name "Maggie" really written by the victim?

 

Payne:              I see your point, Your Honor.

                        Detective Gumshoe, please tell the court a little more about the name on the ground.

 

Gumshoe:         Yes, sir.

 

---------------------------

 

WITNESS TESTIMONY

-- Writing on the Ground --

 

Gumshoe:         We first looked into the handwriting, sir.

Unfortunately, we couldn't confirm that it was the victim's handwriting.

Next, we checked the victim's pointer finger.

We found that there was sand trapped under the victim's fingernail.

There were also scratches on the skin that were caused by him writing on the ground.

From this, we could confirm that the victim wrote this name with his right hand.

 

---------------------------

 

Judge:               Hmm... Yes, a perfectly logical conclusion.

                        Now then, Mr. Wright, you may cross-examine the witness.

 

Phoenix:           Thank you, Your Honor.

 

------------------------

 

CROSS-EXAMINATION

-- Writing on the Ground --

 

Gumshoe:         We first looked into the handwriting, sir.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT! 

But can you really determine handwriting based on a sample written in sand?

 

Gumshoe:         Heh, this is why amateurs are amateurs.

                        We're not a buncha simpletons, pal!

                        Scientific investigation in this country's actually pretty good.

 

Judge:               Hmm, I believe it's time to get back to the real point.

 

Payne:              Agreed, Your Honor.  So, what was the result of the investigation?

 

Gumshoe:         Unfortunately, we couldn't confirm that it was the victim's handwriting.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

So in the end, you couldn't confirm it?

 

Gumshoe:         Hey, don't you look down on us!

                        I told you!  We're not a bunch of simpletons, pal!

                        Everyone knows you can't find out everything you want with scientific investigation!

 

Judge:               I've never heard that before.

 

Payne:              Me, either.

 

Phoenix:           Nor I.

 

Byrde:               I never heard anything like that at the police academy, sir...

 

Gumshoe:         Okay, so I made it up.  Anyway...

 

Gumshoe:         Next, we checked the victim's pointer finger.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

His pointer finger?

 

Gumshoe:         You know, they one you're always POINTING and waving around in people's faces.

 

Phoenix:           Aha, ha, ha.  Don't tell me it bothers you...

 

Gumshoe:         Every time you do it, I have a mini-heart attack.  It's like you're trying to kill me, pal.

 

Payne:              In any case, you examined the victim's index finger, correct?

 

Gumshoe:         Yeah.  We figured there should be something on his finger if he had been writing in sand.

 

Judge:               Hmm...  And the results?

 

Gumshoe:         We found that there was sand trapped under the victim's fingernail.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

And what does that prove?

 

Gumshoe:         Well, it proves that he did write that name with his own finger.

 

Payne:              Yes, which explains why there was sand stuck under his nail.

 

Phoenix:           (I guess he's right...)

 

Gumshoe:         And there's more...

 

Gumshoe:         There were also scratches on the skin that were caused by him writing on the ground.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

"Scratches on his skin?"

 

Gumshoe:         Yup.  You can't see them with your naked eye, but they're there.

 

Judge:               That is incredible!

 

Gumshoe:         Sure is!  That's the power of scientific investigation!

                        They're so small that we had to use a magnifying glass... like a really strong one.

                        It's got that really scientific-sounding name...

 

Phoenix:           You mean a microscope?

 

Gumshoe:         Yeah, that's it!

                        We used one of those and that's how we found them!

 

Phoenix:           (I can't believe this guy doesn't know what a microscope is...)

 

Gumshoe:         From this, we could confirm that the victim wrote this name with his right hand.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

Are you absolutely sure?

 

Gumshoe:         I believe in the power of science.

 

Phoenix:           Hmm, I wonder if my evidence is solid enough to counter with?

 

Phoenix:           (Listening to this, you would think there was only one conclusion...)

                        (that the name was definitely written by the victim...)

 

Byrde:               But don't you think that would be really strange, sir!?

                        If Dustin really wrote that message with his right hand,

                        do you think I would have gone through that much trouble to get him his present?

 

Phoenix:           (The present...?  What about it...?)

 

Gumshoe:         From this, we could confirm that the victim wrote this name with his right hand.

 

PRESENT ---> Baseball Glove

 

Phoenix:           OBJECTION!

Detective Gumshoe.  Take a look at this.

 

Gumshoe:         That's the glove, right?

 

Phoenix:           Could you tell the court what is special about this glove?

 

Gumshoe:         What's special?  Um, never really thought about it, but uh...

                        It's REALLY yellow... ... And that's about it.

 

Phoenix:           Yes, it's REALLY yellow, but that is only one of its qualities.

 

Gumshoe:         Huh?

 

Phoenix:           There's another reason why it's special.

 

Judge:               And what would that be?

 

Phoenix:           It's very simple.

                        This glove is made for a left-handed person!

 

Gumshoe:         Left-handed...?

 

Judge:               Why, you're absolutely right!

                        This glove is made to be worn on the right hand!

 

Phoenix:           That is why it had to be custom-made.

                        I have never seen a bright yellow left-hander's glove for sale.  Have you?

 

Gumshoe:         Well, um... no.

 

Phoenix:           So, Detective.

                        Which hand did the victim use to write the name with, again...?

 

Gumshoe:         That's easy!

                        Look, it's obvious from this picture that it was his...  W-w-wait a sec...

 

Phoenix:           Don't forget that the victim was left-handed!

 

Gumshoe:         Aaaaah!!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

This is... That is... I mean... I... Objec--

 

Judge:               Overruled.

                        Mr. Wright, I would like to know what your line of reasoning proves.

 

Phoenix:           There is only one conclusion that can be drawn!

                        A left-handed person could not have written a message with his right hand!

                        Therefore!

                        The person who wrote the name "Maggie" could not have been the victim!

 

[courtroom-murmur]

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Order! Order!

                        When you think about it that way, then yes,

                        it is not possible that this name was written by the victim himself.

 

Gumshoe:         Then that means Maggey is...!

 

Payne:              No...  IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!!

 

Judge:               Mr. Payne.

 

Payne:              Y-y-yes, Your Honor?

 

Judge:               The evidence the prosecution has presented has failed to prove the defendant's guilt.

                        In fact, I believe you have proven her to be innocent!

 

Payne:              NOOOOOO!

 

Byrde:               Alright! You did it, Mr. Wright!

                        Whew! I feel like I can breathe again!

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               It seems that we have reached the conclusion.

                        You did a fine job once again, Mr. Wright.

 

Phoenix:           Me, Your Honor?  Ah, well, thank you, sir...

 

Byrde:               See, you got complimented by the judge again!  You're really good!

                        And that's why you can't give up being a lawyer, sir!

 

Phoenix:           (Are you joking!?  I'm more than ready to retire!)

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               I will now announce my verdict.

                        This court finds the defendant, Maggey Byrde...

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

No!! Not yet!

                        I mean, please give me a few more minutes, Your Honor.

 

Judge:               Wh-what is the meaning of this, Mr. Payne!?

 

Payne:              The prosecution is not finished yet!

 

Phoenix:           What do you mean!?

 

Payne:              We would like to call our next witness to the stand!

 

Phoenix:           Whaaaaaaat!?

 

[courtroom murmur]

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               And what did this witness... witness?

 

Payne:              The moment the victim was pushed to his death!

                        What's more, he saw the very face of the culprit!

 

Phoenix:           What the heck!?

 

[courtroom murmur]

 

[gavel-whack-whack-whack!]

 

Judge:               Order!  Order in the court!

                        I believe a recess is in order.

                        Afterward, we will hear from this new witness.

 

Phoenix:           (I had a feeling that was a bit too easy...)

                        (Hmm, I need more information.  I'll have to see what I can find out during this recess.)

                        (I can't let my guard down!  It's only going to get tougher from here!)

 

Judge:               Court is adjourned for recess!

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

To be continued.

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

September 8, 11:43 AM

District Court

Defendant Lobby No. 1

 

Byrde:               A-amnesia!?

                        I can't believe my lawyer's trying to defend me in such a state...

 

Phoenix:           ... I... Uh...

 

Byrde:               Why didn't you tell me, sir!?

 

Phoenix:           I'm sorry I didn't mention it to you.

 

Byrde:               Oh! I know what to do!

                        I heard you can fix something like this with a really strong shock to your system!

                        Come on, lower your head a little!  A Maggey Kick should be all you need!

 

Phoenix:           Ah, no, no, no.  I think I'll pass on this one.

 

Byrde:               Come on!... Ah, I'm sorry.

                        Whenever I see someone in trouble, I have a hard time leaving them alone...

                        I tend to stick my nose where it doesn't belong and try to tackle everyone's problems.

 

Phoenix:           (Well, my head's one problem you won't be tackling today...)

 

Phoenix:           Well, we're here to solve your problem first.  We can deal with mine later.

                        For now, do you think you can fill me in on a few things?

 

Byrde:               Of course!  I'd be honored to!

                        Ah, well, I guess we'll start with my name and then I can tell you about me!

 

Phoenix:           No, no, that's ok.  Really.  I think I know you and your name pretty well by now.

                        I was wondering if you could help me figure out a few things about myself.

                        So, my name is "Phoenix Wright"?  What a weird name.

 

Byrde:               Hmmmm... This is serious.  You really don't remember.

                        I'll tell you what, sir.  You can have this back, and maybe it'll help!

 

Phoenix:           ...?  This is... a business card?

 

Byrde:               I got this from you.  It's my most prized possession!

                        You can borrow it for now, but please give it back, OK!?

 

Phoenix:           OK.

                        (There are some numbers written on the back...)

 

Byrde:               Oh, that's your cell phone number!

 

[Phoenix's Business Card added to the Court Record.]

 

Phoenix:           I guess for now, we should stop talking about me,

                        and start talking about this case.

 

Byrde:               This case...?

 

Phoenix:           Yup.  Can you think of anything that would be helpful for me to know?

 

Byrde:               Um, what can I tell you...?  Ah, um... Hmm...

                        I can't think of anything other than the incident with that cell phone, but...

 

Phoenix:           Cell phone?

 

Byrde:               Yeah!  Your eyes lit up when we talked about it at the Detention Center, sir!

 

Phoenix:           ...!

                        Hurry up then and tell me!  This might be very important!

 

Byrde:               OK!  Roger!

 

---------------------------

 

Byrde:               It was on the day of the crime, just before 6 PM...

                        I picked up a lost cell phone while on a walk with Dustin.

 

Phone:              ...............

 

Byrde:               All of a sudden, the phone began to ring...

 

Phone:              ...*beep*...

 

Byrde:               "Um, hello?"

 

???:                  "Oh, thank you!  I've been searching for my phone."

 

Byrde:               "Is this yours? Oh, I'm glad you called! We can meet up and I can give this back!"

 

???:                  "I'll be right there, um... I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name..."

 

Byrde:               "You can call me Maggey!"

 

---------------------------

 

Byrde:               We agreed to meet up at 6 PM.

                        Dustin and I waited for the person to show up...

                        but they never did.

 

Phoenix:           Hmmmm...

                        So where is the phone you found now?

 

Byrde:               I gave it to you yesterday!

 

Phoenix:           Huh? To me?

                        (Is it that phone in my pocket...?)

                        Y-you mean this?

 

Byrde:               Do you think it has anything to do with the murder?

 

Phoenix:           I... don't really know...

                        But if my eyes "lit up"...

 

???:                  AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!  YOU WERE HERE ALL ALONG!!

 

???:                  You're so mean!!

                        I called you a million times but you wouldn't pick up!

                        And when I went to check in the courtroom, everyone had already left...

 

Phoenix:           (Ack!  Now who in the heck is this?)

                        (Let me guess.  I'm supposed to know this girl too...)

 

???:                  Hey, good morning, Maggey!

 

Byrde:               And a good morning to you, too, Maya!

 

Maya:               So!?  So!?  How's it going!?

 

Byrde:               Is there a word for "worse than abysmal"...?

 

Maya:               Oh? And what if I said that everything will be fine?

                        That's right!  It's Maya to the rescue with the ultra-decisive super-important evidence!

                        Here you are, Nick!  The thing you wanted me to bring!

 

Phoenix:           Huh? Oh, ah, thanks...

                        (What the heck is this?  A list?)

 

Phoenix:           (It has about 20 people's names and phone numbers written on it.)

 

Maya:               It was kind of tough, but I managed to find out some dirt!

                        It looks like these guys are up to no good.

 

Phoenix:           "No good"?  As in?

 

Maya:               There's a group of con artists the police are currently investigating.

                        I think these guys are members of that group.

 

[Names List added to the Court Record.]

 

Phoenix:           Why would a group of con artists pop up in a case like this?

 

Maya:               Don't look at me!

 

Phoenix:           Hmm... And where did you get this list from in the first place?

 

Maya:               Whaaaaat!?  Why are you asking that!?

                        You're the one who asked me to look this up yesterday!

 

Phoenix:           Oh... is that right?

 

Maya:               These numbers were in the memory of that phone Maggey found.

 

Phoenix:           Hmm, so that's where they're from.

 

Maya:               You're awfully forgetful these days, Nick.

                        I hope I never get to be a forgetful old prune like you!

 

Byrde:               Um, Maya... Actually, Mr. Wright is...

 

Bailiff:               Mr. Wright! Recess is now over.

                        Please bring the defendant and return to the courtroom immediately!

 

Maya:               Oh, oops!  Guess you have to get going!  We can talk about you being old later, Nick!

 

Byrde:               W-wish us luck!

 

Phoenix:           (I guess I have all the pieces now... More or less.)

                        (All that's left is to put it all together.  I'm not going to lose this.  I can't!)

 

Maya:               Come on, Nick.  Better get a move on!

 

Phoenix:           Y-yeah.

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

September 8, 11:54 AM

District Court

Courtroom No. 2

 

[courtroom murmur]

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               The court will now reconvene.  Please call your next witness to the stand, Mr. Payne.

 

Payne:              Yes, Your Honor.

                        But before I do, if I may say a few words...

 

Judge:               What is it, Mr. Payne?

 

Payne:              It's about the next witness.

                        He has a tendency to say things that rub people the wrong way, you see,

                        so I ask that the court might be a little lenient on...

 

Judge:               There is not need to give a preface.  Just hurry up and call your witness, please.

 

Payne:              Y-yes, Your Honor.  ...The prosecution calls its next witness;

                        a drifter who was taking a walk in the park on the day of the murder!

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Payne:              Please state your name for the court, witness.

 

???:                  Before I do, I'd like to clarify a little something

 

Payne:              Huh?  Oh, alright, go ahead.

 

???:                  Just now, you introduced my wonderful self to the court, correct?

                        Perhaps as a "drifter who was taking a walk"?

 

Payne:              D-did I?

 

???:                  But I will not stand for that!  Now you've tinted the court's eyes and colored me wrongly.

                        Sure, I suppose calling me a university student would not be the absolute truth,

                        but to give in and just settle would be as evil as death and I can't have that!

                        Everything in my life is to be of the utmost, highest, top grade quality, you understand.

                        I am merely looking for that perfect, top notch, unbeatable university, don't you see...?

                        I have a rigorous selection process and I was in serious thought during my "walk" as...

 

Payne:              Yes, yes, I understand.  I'm very sorry.  I will be more careful from now on.

 

Maya:               Wh-what is he?  A human chatterbox?

 

Phoenix:           Ugh... I have to question HIM?

 

???:                  Fashion!  Cars!  Women!  Glasses!  And of course, University!  First-rates only need apply!

 

Phoenix:           (Glasses...? But you aren't wearing glasses...)

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               That's enough!  Your name, witness.

 

???:                  Oh? Is that how you want to play this?

                        Using your power and influence to keep the young people down.  I see how you work now.

                        You old people and your dirty tricks.  You thought you had me, but you thought wrong.

 

Judge:               I-I'm sorry.  It won't happen again.

 

Phoenix:           (Oh man...)

 

???:                  I forgive you.  Alright, I suppose I can tell you my name.

    

Wellington:        I am Richard Wellington, the "Drifting Virtuoso" with a Ph.D. in Drifting, as it were.

                        If you wanted to, you could call me a "University Student in Transit".

 

Payne:              Ahem, Mr. Wellington.

                        On the day of the murder, you were taking a... er, strolling through the park, correct?

 

Wellington:        It would appear that you are attached to that word.  If you must, then by all means.

                        But I remind you that I am in now way a prepubescent boy, "out on a walk" with mommy.

                        If you must know, I--

 

Payne:              Anyway!  Please testify to this court what you saw during your walk through the park!

 

Wellington:        See, you said it again!  "Taking a walk"...  You know, you--

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               What you witnessed will do, Mr. Wellington!

 

---------------------------

 

WITNESS TESTIMONY

-- What I Saw That Day --

 

Wellington:        I was at the park all afternoon, deep in thought about my life situation.

I don't remember the time all that well, but I do believe it was past 6 PM.

All of a sudden, a police officer falls from above, right in front of my eyes.

Without a thought, I looked up, and there I met the eyes of a charming, young lady.

Of course I remember her sweet face.  It was that of the pretty defendant there.

The only other thing I saw was the banana that fell with the police officer.

 

---------------------------

 

Judge:               Hmm, that was certainly a decisive testimony.

 

Maya:               Decisive!?  Nick, did you hear what he just said!?

 

Phoenix:           Yeah.

 

Maya:               That's all you have to say?  How can you be so calm!?

 

Phoenix:           (It's strange... My mind is very calm and clear.)

                        Maybe it's because I... believe in my client.

 

Maya:               You mean Maggey?

 

Phoenix:           Yes.  And if she really is innocent, then that can only mean one thing:

                        That guy is lying!

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               You may now question the witness, Mr. Wright.

 

Phoenix:           (I'll find the truth, no matter how well you craft your lies!)

 

---------------------------

 

CROSS-EXAMINATION

-- What I Saw That Day --

 

Wellington:        I was at the park all afternoon, deep in thought about my life situation.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

So you were at the park all afternoon?  You seem to have a lot of free time.

 

Wellington:        Hmph.  That was very rude of you.  But then again, what can I expect?

                        That's what you get from a man who graduated from a no-name, trashy university.

 

Phoenix:           N-no name?  Trashy...?

 

Wellington:        Now, this might be hard for a mush-headed, feeble-minded baboon like you, but

                        I have to think very carefully about the future of our great country.

 

Phoenix:           But I thought you said you were thinking about which college to go to just now...

 

Wellington:        Oh, puh-leaze.  Which university I go to will directly affect the very future of this counrty!

 

Phoenix:           (That arrogant little snot...)

 

Wellington:        I don't remember the time all that well, but I do believe it was past 6 PM.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

How did you know what time it was?  I see you're not wearing a watch, so...

 

Wellington:        Is that the best you can do?  Do you think you can discredit me like that?

                        You're just a third-rate, biased fool.  I guess I can't expect real smarts from you.

 

Phoenix:           (Grr... His arrogance is really intolerable...  So, what should I do now?)

 

---> Press harder

 

Phoenix:           Answer the question!  How did you know what time it was!?

 

Wellington:        Tsk, tsk.  I can't believe I have to deal with a worm like you.

                                                            You're just a shallow man who can only slam on desks and point at people for fun.

                                                            Hmph, I guess I don't have a choice.

                                                            I'll try to explain it so that even a third-rate simpleton like you can understand.

                                                            There was this little thing they call a "clock" at the park.

                                                            Did you get that?  Do you know what a clock is?  It's a thing that tells you the time.

 

Payne:              As you can see, Mr. Wright, it's even in this picture of the crime scene.

 

Phoenix:           (Oh... So it is... Urk.)

 

Wellington:        I looked at that clock, and that's how I knew the time.

                                                            But if you ask me, this whole concept of breaking time apart into fragments...

                                                            It's total and utter nonsense that no man should follow.

                                                            A real first-class person doesn't live by, nor is he chained by, time.

                                                            And to wear a watch?  Hah!  What a ridiculous notion!

                                                            People should live freely without constraints!  That's how life should be!

 

Phoenix:           (And yet again, another flood of meaningless words...)

                                                            (Talk about a first-class waste of time...)

 

Wellington:        In any case...

 

---> Leave him be

 

Phoenix:           (Well, I guess there's no point in pressing him further.)

                                                            (After all, there was a clock right there at the crime scene...)

 

Wellington:        All of a sudden, a police officer falls from above, right in front of my eyes.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

And how did you know he was a police officer?

 

Wellington:        You obviously have no idea how powerful my deductive reasoning skills are.

                        With one glance, I could tell just what kind of occupation he held.

                        That shoddy, do-it-yourself hairstyle practically screamed "I am a police officer".

                        It was also the way he tied his tie and those cheap, low-quality shoes.  Ugh.

                        Oh, and I suppose it was also because he was wearing an officer's uniform.

 

Phoenix:           (Shouldn't that statement have come first!?)

 

Maya:               Wow, that's pretty impressive.

                        Hey, Nick!  Do you think he's figured out what I do?

 

Phoenix:           (Even I haven't figured that out yet...)

 

Wellington:        Without a thought, I looked up, and there I met the eyes of a charming, young lady.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

Are you sure you got a good look at her face?

 

Wellington:        Animals have this thing called an "eye", Mr. Wright.  They use this "eye" to see things.

                        In the case of humans, we have two of them.  Yes, even you!

 

Phoenix:           I don't care if I have them or not!  Did you or did you not get a clear look at her face!?

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

That's what the witness was just about to get to.

                        I would like to request that Mr. Wright not use such a loud voice during questioning.

 

Judge:               Sustained.  Mr. Wright, please refrain from raising your voice in this court.

 

Phoenix:           (Then please don't make me have to raise my voice.)

 

Wellington:        Are you finished?  I'd like to continue, if that's alright with you.

 

Wellington:        Of course I remember her sweet face.  It was that of the pretty defendant there.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

So you're SURE you are not mistaken?

 

Wellington:        Please.  Don't confuse your pitiful, train-wreck of a life with mine.

                        I'm what you call a famous brand-name product, while you are only a cheap imitation.

                        There is no way someone as magnificent as myself could have made a mistake.

 

Payne:              Of course, of course.

 

Phoenix:           (Oh ho ho ho.  Of course.)

 

Judge:               Did you notice anything else of interest, witness?

 

Wellington:        The only other thing I saw was the banana that fell with the police officer.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

The banana...?

 

Wellington:        Well, it was actually more than just one.  More like a bunch of bananas.

 

Phoenix:           Now what would a bunch of bananas be doing there...?

 

Wellington:        And why would I know such a thing?  I'm only telling you what I saw.

 

Maya:               That's really strange.  Maggey never mentioned anything about a bunch of bananas.

                        That's it, Nick!  He's gotta be lying about the bananas!

 

Phoenix:           (Hmm... He could be, but...)

                        (there's not reason for him to lie about there being bananas at the crime scene.)

                        And what if it's not a lie?

 

Maya:               Well, maybe he thought he was seeing one thing, and it was something else...?

 

Phoenix:           (If he mistook something else for a bunch of bananas, then that would be an inaccuracy.)

                        (Think Phoenix, think!)

 

Phoenix:           (If my client is innocent, there is no way he could've seen what he says he did.)

 

Maya:               Which means if we can somehow show he's lying...

 

Phoenix:           Yeah, that's exactly what we need do.

                        (She's right.  She's got a sharp mind, but I just wish I could remember who she is...)

 

Maya:               Is everything OK, Nick...?

 

Wellington:        The only other thing I saw was the banana that fell with the police officer.

 

PRESENT ---> Baseball Glove

 

Phoenix:           OBJECTION!

Mr. Wellington.

                        I believe I have the bananas you saw... right here!

 

Wellington:        Ah, so you knew about the bananas, too.  Why didn't you say so earlier?

                        But don't think you can use this as a way to pull more information out of me.

 

Phoenix:           (And that's where you'd be wrong.)

 

Judge:               M-Mr. Wright.  What is the meaning of this?

 

Payne:              Isn't that the baseball glove?

 

Wellington:        Huh!?  Wh-wh-what!?  A baseball glove??

 

Phoenix:           Doesn't it look delicious?  Care for a bite?

 

Wellington:        Th-that's...

                        That's not...  It's a... Noooooooo!

 

Phoenix:           Your Honor!  I think this proves one very important fact!

             

Phoenix:           This witness...

 

---> loves bananas

 

Phoenix:           Mr. Wellington loves large bananas!

 

Judge:               ...

 

Payne:              ...

 

Wellington:        ...

 

Courtroom:        ............

 

Maya:               Uh, Nick...

                                                I hope you've noticed the icy glares we're getting from everyone in there!

 

Judge:               Wh-what in the world do you mean?

 

Wellington:        I'll have you know I like strawberries much better than bananas.

 

Phoenix:           Whoops...

 

Judge:               Think it over one more time and try again, Mr. Wright.

 

---> knows nothing about baseball

 

Phoenix:           Mr. Wellington has never played baseball!

                                                That would explain why he didn't even know what a glove is!

 

Judge:               ...

 

Payne:              ...

 

Wellington:        ...

 

Courtroom:        ............

 

Maya:               Uh, Nick...

                        I hope you've noticed the icy glares we're getting from everyone in there!

 

Judge:               Wh-what in the world do you mean?

 

Wellington:        When I was in junior high, I was the start pitcher...  Well, 4th in line, actually, but...

 

Phoenix:           Whoops...

 

Judge:               Think it over one more time and try again, Mr. Wright.

 

---> has bad eyesight

 

Phoenix:           By the way, just how bad are your eyes?

 

Wellington:        Huh?  How... What... You... Why are you asking me about this all of a sudden!?

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

Your Honor, it is very simple to mistake a glove for a bunch of bananas...

 

Judge:               No, I don't think so.  Objection overruled.

 

Wellington:        Y-y-you...  You're one of those people.  Yes, you know what I mean.

                        You're like those people who refused to accept Galileo for his Copernican Theory!

                        You're too used to your world view to realize there are other, new possibilities!

                        Sure, in the end, we find out that it is in fact, a glove, not bananas.  However...

                        when viewed from afar, I do think there is room enough for doubt, don't you think...?

 

Phoenix:           And that is why I asked you how bad your eyesight is!

 

Wellington:        They're both 20/25.  I suppose you're going to tell me that's terrible, right!?

 

Judge:               Why are you not wearing your glasses today then?

 

Wellington:        ...

                        Ummm... That's because I lost them recently, you see...

                        Of course, I was planning on getting a new pair made right away!

                        But you know, my glasses are no ordinary glasses, so to replace them --

 

Phoenix:           How about when you witnessed the crime?  Were you wearing your glasses then?

 

Wellington:        ...!

 

Phoenix:           How about it, witness!?

 

Wellington:        Y-you are an unrelenting, evil man.

                        You're like those people who rejected Joan of Arc and put her to death!

                        She was brave and courageous, only to be caught by horrible, unrighteous people.

                        And while she didn't do anything wrong, she was still gruesomely burned at the--

 

Phoenix:           Which boils down to you were not wearing your glasses at that time!

                        Therefore!

                        The identity of the "woman" at the scene of the crime and that of the defendant

                        can not be proven to be the same by this witness!

 

Wellington:        ...!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

But the height difference was only 9 feet!

                        It was very possible for him to see the face of the culprit standing on the upper path!

 

Judge:               Hmm... Witness.

                        Please be more accurate in your testimony.  Remember, a person's life is at stake.

 

Wellington:        Y-yes, Your Honor!

 

Judge:               Now then, please continue your testimony.

 

Payne:              Please tell the court what happened next, in the moments after you witnessed the crime.

 

------------------------

 

WITNESS TESTIMONY

-- What Happened Next --

 

Wellington:        The girl on the upper path ran away as soon as she realized I was there.

After that, I immediately called the police station to report the crime.

It must've been 6:45 PM when I made the call.

They must have a lot of free time on their hands since they showed up within 10 minutes.

 

------------------------

 

Judge:               Hmm...

                        So the person who was on the upper path saw you and then ran away.

 

Wellington:        Yes, that is correct.

                        Which is why, even someone without a superior brain like mine can understand that...

                        that girl is the murderer!

 

Judge:               You may question the witness now, Mr. Wright.

 

------------------------

 

CROSS EXAMINATION

-- What Happened Next --

 

Wellington:        The girl on the upper path ran away as soon as she realized I was there.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

She ran away, just like that?

 

Wellington:        Yes, she did.  She saw me and flew the nest like the guilty bird she is.

                        Oh, I'm sorry.  Was that pun too hard for someone who only got a third-rate education?

 

Phoenix:           (Actually, that did take me a few seconds to get...)

                        Anyway, if she ran away the instant she saw you, how could you tell it was my client?

 

Wellington:        Eek!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

The witness has already answered that question.

                        He has stated that the defendant is the culprit!

 

Judge:               This is true.  Mr. Wright, I'm striking your question from the record.

 

Phoenix:           (Hmm, how can I get more information out of him?)

 

Wellington:        After that, I immediately called the police station to report the crime.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

Immediately?  As in?

 

Wellington:        As in immediately!  I mean, sure, a minute might have elapsed before I did, but...

                        That's the duty of every good citizen, or did they not teach that at your pitiful school?

 

Phoenix:           (You think people learn about how to call the police in COLLEGE!?)

 

Maya:               Hey, Nick.  I think you should take a look at the Court Record for a sec.

 

Phoenix:           (...?)

 

Wellington:        It must've been 6:45 PM when I made the call.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

How do you know what time it was...?

 

Wellington:        That detective told me.  You know which one I mean.

                        The one with the jacket that makes him look like a dropout from a no-name high school.

 

Gumshoe:         Hey, pal!  I graduated from a pretty good, I mean, top-ranked college!

 

Phoenix:           (I don't believe this.)

 

Wellington:        It doesn't matter.  I don't believe I was mistaken on what time I called.

                        And if I am wrong, then that detective obviously doesn't know how to tell time.

 

Gumshoe:         What!?  Why you!!!  You're just some lousy kid who...

 

Payne:              I think the court can see your point.  Anyway, how did the police respond?

 

Wellington:        They must have a lot of free time on their hands since they showed up within 10 minutes.

 

PRESS --->

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

So you're saying that there were police on the scene by 7:00 PM?

 

Wellington:        They got there before that, I think.

                        There usually aren't many people in that area at that time of day.

                        But suddenly, before I knew it, there were people crawling all over gawking.

                        It certainly says something about the morals of the people in this country.

 

Phoenix:           (I can't find anything out of the ordinary in his testimony...)

 

Maya:               Why don't you take one more look at the Court Record?

 

Phoenix:           Yeah, I guess I should.

 

Wellington:        After that, I immediately called the police station to report the crime.

 

PRESENT ---> Dustin's Autopsy Report

 

Phoenix:           OBJECTION!

Mr. Wellington, would you please take a look at this?

 

Judge:               You mean the victim's autopsy report?

 

Phoenix:           According to this, the murder occurred at 6:28 PM.

 

Wellington:        So what of it?

 

Phoenix:           You said that you called the police immediately after the murder took place.

                        However, by the time you had called the police, it was already 6:45 PM.

                        There is clearly a 15 minute gap here!  Do you deny it!?

 

Wellington:        Aaaack!

 

Phoenix:           I think this court would like to hear what you were doing during this 15 minute gap!

 

Wellington:        Grrrrrr! 

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

The witness was in shock at the time after witnessing a terrible murder!

                        It's only to be expected that he would be a little dazed...

 

Phoenix:           OBJECTION!

                        Fifteen minutes is hardly what I would call "a little dazed"!

 

Payne:              Aaaaah!

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Mr. Wellington.

 

Wellington:        Y-yes?

 

Judge:               Explain yourself.  What were you doing during those 15 minutes?

 

Wellington:        ...

 

Phoenix:           Answer the question!

 

Wellington:        ... I... Uhh... Telephone...  Err... I mean...

 

Phoenix:           Spit it out!

 

Wellington:        I... I was searching for a phone booth!

 

Phoenix:           A phone booth?

 

Judge:               You mean, you don't have a cell phone?

 

Wellington:        ...!  You and your questions!  As if you're trying to open all the layers of a Matryoshka doll.

                        You must think you're really something special!

 

Phoenix:           Witness!

 

Wellington:        I-I lost my cell phone!  There!  Are you happy!?

 

Phoenix:           You lost it...?

 

Judge:               Unbelievable!  You lose your glasses, and your cell phone!

                        You must be very scatterbrained when it comes to your belongings.

 

Wellington:        What!?  Are you saying that first-rate people are never allowed to lose things!?

                        Haven't you ever heard that all geniuses have a strange quirk or two?

                        So by that rationale, since I have my own quirk, it would mean that I am a genius!

                        I don't think simple, plain people like you could understa--

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Enough!

 

Phoenix:           (Oh man, oh man...)

                        (Wait! Hold on a second.  He lost... his cell phone?)

 

Maya:               Nick! That cell phone! Could it be...?

 

Phoenix:           You mean this phone Maggey found? There's no way...!

             

Phoenix:           (Boy, I didn't see this coming.  What should I do now...?)

 

 ---> Back off

 

Phoenix:           (It's probably just a coincidence.)

                                                (I mean, what are the chances that this phone is that snob's anyway?)

 

Maya:               Nick!?  What do you think you're doing!?

                                                You really should check out this lead!

 

Judge:               Is there a problem, Mr. Wright?

 

Phoenix:           N-no, Your Honor.

                                                (I should give this some more thought...)

 

---> Question further

 

Phoenix:           Mr. Wellington!

                                                Where is your cell phone right now?

 

Wellington:        Heh, what are you getting all excited about?  You seem to be a little confused.

                                                I found my phone, I'll have you know.  See.  Here is it.

 

Phoenix:           Oh... I see...

 

Maya:               Hmm, looks like he's got his phone.

                                                And I thought that just maybe this was his.

 

Phoenix:           Hmm...

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Well then, I think we've cleared this issue up.

                        At the time of the murder, the witness did not have his cell phone because he lost it.

                        Therefore, the delay in his call was caused by his search for a phone booth.

 

Wellington:        Well, that's the gist of it.  I guess you could put it that way and leave it at that.

 

Judge:               Do you have any further questions, Mr. Wright?

 

---> No further questions

 

Phoenix:           Hmm... No, I think I'm done here, Your Honor.

 

Maya:               Wait, wait, wait!  What is with you today, Nick!?

                                                Take a good look at the Court Record!!

 

Phoenix:           Huh?

                                                What are you talking...?  ...  Ah... Aaaaaaaah!

 

Judge:               What is it, Mr. Wright?  By your screaming, I assume you have a question after all?

 

---> There is something...

 

            [continue]

 

 

Phoenix:           Your Honor!  The witness' testimony does not make sense!

                        I don't believe that there was ever a need for the witness to search for a phone!

 

Wellington:        H-How dare you!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

You can't just make outrageous claims like that!  You do have some sort of proof, don't you?

 

Phoenix:           Well, yeah... O-of course!

                        (This evidence should be good enough, I think...)

 

Judge:               Alright.  Let's have this proof, then.

 

Judge:               Please present proof that the witness had no need to search for a public phone booth!

 

PRESENT --> Wrong evidence

 

                        Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

It's very simple!  This is the evidence that backs up my claim!

 

                        Judge:               And yet again you have presented this court with an obscure, meaningless item.

 

                        Phoenix:           Huh?  This evidence?  It's meaningless?

 

                        Maya:               I don't get it at all!

                                                Why do you think he wouldn't need to look for a phone in the first place!?

 

                        Phoenix:           Well, that's... because...

                                                I was looking at the evidence and it just hit me.

                                                I thought, "Hey, he really didn't have to look for a phone."

 

                        Maya:               Then why don't you hurry up and present that piece of evidence!?

 

                        Phoenix:           (Hmm, now what was that piece of evidence again...?)

 

PRESENT --> Crime Photo 1

 

                        Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

It's quite simple, actually.  Please take a look at this.

 

                        [continue]

 

Judge:               At the crime scene photo?

 

Payne:              Is there a problem with it?

 

Phoenix:           Oh, there's nothing wrong with the picture.

                        But if you don't understand my logic after looking at it, something is wrong with you!

 

Wellington:        Noooo!

 

Judge:               It's... It's... A phone booth!

 

Phoenix:           That is correct!

                        All the defendant had to do was walk three steps!

                        Mr. Wellington!  Why did you not use the phone that was right in front of you!?

 

Wellington:        Ooooouughn!

 

[courtroom murmur}

 

[gavel-whack-whack!]

 

Judge:               Order! Order!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

Wh-what does reporting the crime a little late prove for you!?

 

Phoenix:           OBJECTION!

The witness can't explain what he was doing for those 15 minutes!

                        That is reason enough to throw suspicion on his testimony!

 

Judge;               Yes, this is very true.  What do you have to say for yourself, witness!?

 

Wellington:        ...

 

Maya:               Then I bet this phone really is his, Nick!

                        He must've killed Dustin to get his phone back!

 

Phoenix:           But Maggey said that she was going to return it to him.

                        So there was no reason for him to kill for it.

                        And on top of that, we still have the phone she found anyway.

 

Maya:               Hmm... But if he wasn't looking for his cell phone,

                        was he looking for something else...?

 

Phoenix:           (Was he...?)

 

Judge:               Mr. Wright.

 

Phoenix:           Yes, Your Honor?

 

Judge:               Do you have any thoughts you would like to share with the court?

                        Can you offer an explanation as to what the witness was doing during those 15 minutes?

 

            --> No, I have no idea.

 

                        Phoenix:           I'm afraid it's too early to say anything for sure at this time.

 

                        Judge:               I see...  Mr. Payne?

                                                Will we be hearing further testimony from the prosecution?

 

                        Payne:              No, Your Honor.  That is all.

 

                        Phoenix:           Oh crud...

 

                        Judge:               This witness has said that he saw the defendant commit the crime at the crime scene.

                                                While it is true that the witness was not wearing his glasses at the time,

                                                the court feels that since he was near the culprit, positive identification is possible.

 

                        Phoenix:           Which means...?

 

                        Judge:               The guilt of the defendant, Maggey Byrde, has been sufficiently substantiated.

 

                        Phoenix:           WHAAAAAAAT!?

 

                        Maya:               Nick! You have to do something before it's too late!!

 

                        Judge:               I hereby close the cross-exami--

 

                        Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

W-wait!

                                                As to the actions of Mr. Wellington during the 15 minute gap,

                                                the defense would like to propose an explanation!

 

                        Payne:              OBJECTION!

I thought the defense had just finished proving that this couldn't be explained!

 

                        Phoenix:           No, there is one possibility!

 

            --> Yes, I have an idea.

 

                        Phoenix:           There is only one possible explanation.

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Alright.  Let's hear your explanation.

                        However, be forewarned that if your explanation is not persuasive,

                        you will be penalized.  Think carefully before you present, Mr. Wright.

 

Phoenix:           Yes, Your Honor!

                        (Urk. I probably shouldn't have said there was only one possibility...)

 

Judge:               Please present to the court the one piece of evidence that will answer the following:

                        "Why didn't the witness call the police right away?"

 

            --> PRESENT: Wrong evidence

 

                        Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

Perhaps this is the evidence you need to be convinced!

 

                        Judge:               ...

Perhaps?

 

                        Phoenix:           Aha ha ha.  That was just an idea I thought I'd throw out.

 

                        Judge:               I suggest that "perhaps" you should find a better piece of evidence.

 

                        Phoenix:           Yes, of course, Your Honor!  Well then...

 

                        Judge:               But before you do, you will be penalized.

 

                        Phoenix:           (Ouch.)

 

            --> PRESENT: Glasses

 

                        Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

Mr. Wellington!

 

                        Wellington:        Wh-what!?  Don't do that!  You almost made me have a heart attack!

 

                        Phoenix:           These are your glasses, aren't they?

 

                        Wellington:        Ah!  Where... Where did you find--!? Ghaaaa!

 

                        Phoenix:           I believe the court all heard what you just confessed to:

                                                That these glasses are in fact yours!

 

[courtroom murmur]

 

Phoenix:           I'll tell you where they were found, Mr. Wellington.

                        These glasses were found under the victim's body.

 

Wellington:        U-under the v-victim's body!?

 

[courtroom murmur]

 

[gavel-whack-whack-whack!]

 

Judge:               Order!  Order!

 

Wellington:        N-now, w-wait a second!  Hold on!

                        I-I didn't confess or confirm a-any-anything!

 

Phoenix:           Your Honor! I think the answer is quite clear here!

                        As he fell, Dustin Prince grabbed the culprit's glasses.

                        The culprit knew that he had to find his glasses, and searched frantically for them.

                        What he didn't realize was that they were under the victim's body!

                        And that is why it took him 15 minutes to make that call!

 

[courtroom murmur]

 

[gavel-whack-whack-whack!]

 

Judge:               M-Mr. Wright!  Are you...?

                        Are you indicting the witness as the real murderer!?

 

Phoenix:           Of course!  That is precisely what I am doing!

 

Wellington:        Oooo...  OOOOUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!

 

[courtroom murmur]

 

Phoenix:           (I know I'm right!)

                        (He is the real murderer!)

 

Maya:               Did you figure it out, Nick!?

 

Phoenix:           More or less.

                        Turns out this cell phone was the key to this case after all.

                        Anyway, now is our chance to deep-six this guy.

                        I'll sink him in one shot!

 

Maya:               Yeah!

                        This is so exciting, watching you work again!

 

Phoenix:           (Somehow, my old self is coming back to me.)                    

                        (It's time to sink or swim; everything rests on the edge of a knife!)

                        (This is the moment I've been waiting for...)

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Order! Order!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

Your Honor! The defense...  The defense is making a mockery of this court!

                        Without any solid ground to stand on, he accuses the witness of being the murderer!

 

Wellington:        Y-y-yeah!  That-that's right!

                        I... I'm no criminal!

                        Th-This third-rate, fraud of a lawyer...

 

Phoenix:           In that case, why don't we look at it from a different perspective.

                        Let's hear your explanation as to why you are NOT the murderer!

 

Wellington:        Why, that's... That's easy...  Um... Uh...

                        For example... There's um... The name the victim wrote!  What about that...?

 

Phoenix:           Oh, you mean the name "Maggie"?

 

Wellington:        Y-Yeah!  Even an idiot like you can read that, right?

 

Phoenix:           But we already know this was not written by the victim himself.

                        After all, the defendant's name is "Maggey" and the victim was left-handed.

 

Judge:               So basically, you are saying that in order to make the defendant look guilty,

                        the real criminal used the victim's right hand to write her name on the ground?

 

Wellington:        B-But...  But, but!!

                        Wouldn't that mean that the real criminal was someone the defendant knew?

                        Otherwise, how else would that person know her name was "Maggie", er "Maggey"!?

 

Judge:               That is a good point.

                        The witness didn't even know of Ms. Byrde before this trial.

 

Phoenix:           (Ah, I forgot!)

                        (Hmm, was there any way this creep could've known Maggey's name beforehand?)

 

            ---> There was no way

 

                        Phoenix:           (No matter how I look at it, it's no good!)

                                                (There is no way he could have known Maggey or her name!)

 

                        Maya:               Nick!  You can't let this slimebag get away!

                                                Think harder!

 

                        Phoenix:           Y-you're right...

                                                (OK, let's go over this from the beginning one more time.)

                       

            ---> There was a way

 

                        [continue]

 

Phoenix:           (It would be best if I could prove that the witness had a chance to learn...)

                        (that the defendant's name was "Maggey".)

 

Judge:               Now, will the defense please present its case?

                        How could the witness have known the defendant's name?

 

            ---> PRESENT: Wrong evidence

 

                        Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

This is how!

 

                        Judge:               ...

                                                Am I supposed to take this as evidence that the defense doesn't know what's going on?

 

                        Phoenix:           Huh?...  Oh... Ah ha ha ha.

 

                        Payne:              OBJECTION!

Aren't you a little old to be laughing like a 5-year old?  Take some responsibility!

 

                        Phoenix:           (As if I need a lecture about responsibility from you, of all people...)

 

                        Judge:               The defense will receive a penalty.

                                                Please think carefully before presenting your case again.

 

                        Phoenix:           Yes, Your Honor.

 

 

            ---> PRESENT: Cell Phone

 

                        Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

Mr. Wellington.

                                                You didn't have your cell phone with you on the day of the murder, correct?

 

                        Wellington:        So what if I didn't?

 

                        Phoenix:           When you realized you had lost it, what did you do?

 

                        Wellington:        What did I do?

 

                        Phoenix:           Didn't you try to find it by calling it?

 

                        Wellington:        Why you...!  How did you...!?

 

                        Payne:              OBJECTION!

Your Honor! These questions have nothing to do with...

 

                        Judge:               Overruled.

                                                Mr. Wright, where are you going with this line of questioning?

                                                Do you think there is some relation between this witness' cell phone and the murder?

 

                        Phoenix:           I do, Your Honor.

                                                On the day of the murder, Maggey Byrde picked up a lost phone in the park.

                                                And!

                                                She also received a phone call from the owner of the phone!

 

                        ------------------------------------------

 

                        Phone:              ...............

 

                        Phone:              ...*beep*...

 

                        Byrde:               "Um, hello?"

 

                        ???:                  "Oh, thank you!  I've been searching for my phone."

 

                        Byrde:               "Is this yours? Oh, I'm glad you called! We can meet up and I can give this back!"

 

                        ???:                  "I'll be right there, um... I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name..."

 

                        Byrde:               "You can call me Maggey!"

 

                        ------------------------------------------

 

                        Phoenix:           That was when you learned that her name was "Maggey"!

 

                        Wellington:        Uh, um, nnngh...

 

                        Phoenix:           But you made on fatal mistake.

 

                        Judge:               Fatal mistake?

 

                        Phoenix:           My client's name is "Maggey" but the name that was written on the ground was "Maggie".

                                                This is a mistake that could only occur if all you knew was how her name sounded!

 

                        Wellington:        EEEEEEEEEK!

 

[courtroom murmur]

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Order!  Order!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

B-but, Your Honor!

                        The witness has no motive!

 

Judge:               And your point is?

 

Payne:              It's very simple, Your Honor.  A person usually would not kill someone without a reason.

                        Mr. Wellington had no reason to kill anyone!

 

Wellington:        That is absolutely correct!  I don't have a motive!

 

Judge:               Hmm... Mr. Wright.

 

Phoenix:           Your Honor?

 

Judge:               Can you explain what motive this witness could have had?

 

Phoenix:           ...

                        It's very simple, Your Honor.

 

Wellington:        ...!

 

Maya:               Are you sure, Nick!?

 

Phoenix:           If I said I can't offer an explanation, then the trial's over, right?

 

Maya:               Yeah, but...

 

 [gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Now then, please present to this court proof that the witness had a motive!

 

            ---> PRESENT: wrong evidence

 

Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

The murderer killed the victim because of this!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

The defense is obviously haphazardly throwing out evidence in desperation!

 

Judge:               It certainly seems that way.

                        Don't let all your hard work up to this point go to waste on a random guess.

 

Phoenix:           ...  What was I thinking...?

 

            ---> PRESENT: Names List

 

Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

Mr. Wellington's motive is right here!

 

Judge:               What is this?  ...A list?

 

Phoenix:           These phone numbers were pulled from the memory of the phone the defendant found.

                        And we have determined that the people on this list are members of a "certain group".

 

Wellington:        You... You looked up all those numbers...?

 

Phoenix:           Of course.

                        This list of phone numbers was stored in the cell phone's memory.

                        The names and numbers belong to people who are members of a certain con artists' group.

 

Payne:              Wh-wh-wh-wh-what!?  C-c-con artists!?

 

Phoenix:           Can you explain why these numbers were on your phone, Mr. Wellington!?

 

Wellington:        Th-this... This is an outrage!  An invasion of privacy!

                        Looking up the phone numbers on a person's phone is a worse crime than murder!

                        Y-you're one of those people!

                        You're just like the cops who raided that brilliant artist, Maurice Utrillo's atelier!

                        They disrupted a genius at work and interrupted his dialogue with the Goddess of---

 

Phoenix:           I don't care, Mr. Wellington!

                        All I want is for you to tell us what this list is about!

 

Wellington:        Do you think you -- any of you, can know what it's like to be a refined man like me!?

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

Your Honor!  This-This is...  This is unjust badgering of the witness!

 

Judge:               Objection overruled.

                        Mr. Wright! What is the meaning of this!?

 

Judge:               Why would the witness have the numbers of a group of con artists on his phone!?

 

Phoenix:           Isn't that obvious!?  The witness is...

 

            ---> looking into the group.

 

                        Phoenix:           He's investigating that group!

 

                        Judge:               Excuse me?

 

                        Maya:               What in the world are you saying, Nick!?

                                                If he was just looking into the group, then he has to reason to kill anyone!

 

                        Judge:               I can not accept the defense's answer.

 

                        Phoenix:           (Yeah, I should have seen that coming...)

 

                        Judge:               I'll ask you again:

 

            ---> a victim of that group.

 

                        Phoenix:           He was victimized by this group of con artists!

 

                        Judge:               I-Is that right!?

 

                        Phoenix:           And to take his revenge, he's looking for the names and numbers of the con artists...

 

                        Maya:               Hold on, Nick!  What are you talking about!?

                                                If that's true, then he doesn't have a motive to kill Dustin Prince!

 

                        Phoenix:           ...

                                                (I guess so...)

 

                        Judge:               What is it?  You became quiet all of a sudden.

 

                        Phoenix:           Um, I'm sorry, Your Honor.  I'd like to try one more time.

 

                        Judge:               *sigh* Alright.

                                                One more time, Mr. Wright.

 

            ---> a member of that group.

 

Phoenix:           Mr. Wellington is a member of this very group!

 

Wellington:        Nooooo!

 

Phoenix:           All of your "friends'" phone numbers are stored right here on this phone.

                                                If anyone were to look into these phone numbers, it would be all over for you.

                                                That is why you had to kill.

 

Wellington:        Noooo!  This is tooooo much!!

 

[courtroom murmur]

 

[gavel-whack-whack-whack!]

 

Judge:               Hmm, that does make quite a bit of sense.

                        Well, Mr. Wellington?  Would you care to explain?

 

Wellington:        ... I... Um, I...

 

Phoenix:           (I got you now!)

 

Wellington:        I... I... That... I... That police officer...

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

Your Honor!

 

Judge:               What is it, Mr. Payne?

 

Payne:              Your Honor!  This-This is...  This...  This is unjust badgering of the witness!

 

Judge:               You said the exact same thing only a few seconds ago.

 

Payne:              P-P-P-P-Please!

                        Please, let's think about the content of that phone call!

 

----------------------------------------

 

Phone:              ...*beep*...

 

Byrde:               "Um, hello?"

 

???:                  "Oh, thank you!  I've been searching for my phone."

 

Byrde:               "Is this yours? Oh, I'm glad you called! We can meet up and I can give this back!"

 

----------------------------------------

 

Payne:              The defendant had already promised that she would return the phone.

                        After that, all Mr. Wellington had to do was meet Ms. Byrde to get his phone back.

                        Why, then, would he need to kill anyone!?

 

Judge:               Hmm... That is a valid point.

                        What does the defense thing about this point?

 

Phoenix:           (Hmm...)

                        (If you think about it logically, then it makes sense...)

 

Maya:               Then maybe we should be thinking outside the box!

 

Phoenix:           (Yeah! If we think like that... Let's see...)

                        (Maybe that slimeball saw something at the crime scene that made him commit murder.)

 

Judge:               Your thoughts, Mr. Wright?

 

Phoenix:           Hmm, well...

                        I don't think Mr. Wellington went to pick up his phone in a very friendly manner.

 

Payne:              But he was promised his phone, so why would he have been unfriendly to the defendant?

 

Phoenix:           I think he must have seen something that didn't agree with him when he got there.

 

Judge:               Well, then Mr. Wright...

                        What was this "something" that didn't agree with the witness?

 

            ---> PRESENT: wrong evidence

 

Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

The witness saw this!

 

Judge:               Mr. Wellington.  I-is he correct?

 

Wellington:        ...?

 

Judge:               By the expression on his face, I would say that wasn't it.

 

Phoenix:           (It looks like I was wrong...)

 

Judge:               Wright, Wright, Wright.  Try to think before you present again.

 

Phoenix:           (So, he went to get his cell phone back,)

                        (but when he got there, he lost control of himself.)

                        (It was probably because he saw something that was really bad for him there...)

                        (And that "really bad thing" was...!)

 

            ---> PRESENT: Dustin Price's Profile

 

Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

What Mr. Wellington saw was... the victim.

 

Payne:              T-the... The victim!?  You mean Dustin Prince!?

 

Phoenix:           Dustin Prince had gone on his date right after his shift was over.

                        With no time to change, he went to the park still wearing his police uniform!

 

Judge:               Oh!

 

"The girl that picked up my phone is with a policeman!"

 

Phoenix:           He couldn't have known they were going out so he began to worry.

                        He was afraid the policeman would ask a few questions before returning the phone.

 

"If I do anything suspicious, he might run a check on my phone..."

 

Phoenix:           In his mind, it was possible they had already run a check on the phone!

 

Judge:               And he went into a panic, is what you're saying?

 

Phoenix:           Exactly.

                        Officer Prince was murdered simply because he was in uniform!

 

[courtroom murmur]

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Mr. Payne.  Do you have any comments?

 

Payne:              I, um... I'm thinking...

 

Judge:               Hmm, it seems the truth has come out at last.

                        The witness... Mr. Wellington, you are--

 

Wellington:        Ha... Ah ha ha...

                        AhahahahahahahAhahaaaAHAHAHAAHaahhahaha

                        AHAHAHAHAHAHWAHAHAHAHAHAWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA

                        Ha ha ha ha... Impressive... Not bad for a person with a third-rate education...

 

Phoenix:           What's that supposed to mean!?

 

Wellington:        The evidence... Evidence!

 

Maya:               Uuugh, that guy is really creeping me out--

 

Wellington:        All you've been waving around and talking about is that "suspicious" cell phone.

                        Suspicious phone number this, suspicious con group that!  They're all on that phone!

                        But who's to say that phone is really mine!?  Where's your proof!?  Your evidence!?

 

Phoenix:           You want proof that this phone is yours?

 

Wellington:        Ahahahaha!  Ahehehehehe!  I already told you earlier!

                        That phone I lost -- I've already found it!

                        You don't have even the slightest idea who the phone in your hand belongs to!

                        You can be sure it isn't mine, you simpleton!

 

Phoenix:           WHAT!?

 

[courtroom-murmur]

 

Wellington:        Hehehehe... Heh... Hehehehe... It feels good to see you squirm.

 

Judge:               Hmm... We do seem to have a problem on out hands with this phone.

                        Whose phone is it?  Without knowing that, it's meaningless as evidence.

 

Phoenix:           Your Honor!

                        (This is bad... I can't let him turn the tables on me like this!!)

                        (Hmm... This cell phone...)

                        (There has to be something I've overlooked.  There's got to be!  Hmm... Maybe...)

 

            ---> The phone's stored numbers?

 

Phoenix:           This phone has the names and numbers of those in the con group in its memory.

                                                I can show them to you, Your Honor!

 

Wellington:        I don't believe this.  What are you talking about!?

 

Phoenix:           Uh...

 

Wellington:        What we are trying to determine is who that phone belongs to!

                        Who cares about what phone numbers are stored on it!?

                        Besides, who knows.  Maybe you went and added some of those numbers in yourself!

 

Judge:               The witness is quite right.  I'm afraid I have to reject the defense's proposal.

 

Phoenix:           (Grr... That jerk is back to his arrogant, annoying self again...)

 

            ---> Fingerprints on the phone?

 

Phoenix:           I got it!  We should check for fingerprints!

 

Judge:               Finger... prints...?

 

Phoenix:           Yes, Your Honor.  Mr. Wellington must have left some prints on this phone!

 

Maya:               Nick!  Don't you remember!?

                        When you got that from Maggey, you wiped it off!

 

Phoenix:           I what!?

 

Maya:               You said there was sand all over it, so...

 

Phoenix:           W-wiped it?  I wiped it...?

 

Maya:               Pretty thoroughly, too...

 

Wellington:        WahahaHahaHAHahaha!

                        It's oh-so-much fun watching third-rate trash babble like morons amongst themselves!

 

Phoenix:           (Aaargh!  He's made a complete recovery...)

 

Wellington:        How many times do I have to say this: my phone is right here!  You see?

                        Oh, and incidentally, you can't check the numbers stored on this phone.

                        It must have glitched because all the numbers just magically disappeared!

 

Phoenix:           (You've got to be joking!  He erased all the numbers I was going to use as evidence!)

                        ...

                        Mr. Wellington...

 

Wellington:        What's this?

                        From the way you talk to me, it sounds like you still have some fight left in you.

 

Phoenix:           Where did you finally find your cell phone!?

 

Wellington:        ...

                        ...Heh heh heh...

                        Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

                        Oh, you are too much!

                        And of course you have no idea what I'm talking about!

 

Phoenix:           ...?

             

...

 

Phoenix:           I... I...  Oh my g--  NOW I REMEMBER!!

 

----------------------------------

 

Phone:              ............

                        ...*beep*...

 

Phoenix:            Huh, looks like they hung up.

 

???:                  Ah, good.   I finally found it.

 

----------------------------------

 

Phoenix:           (So that's when...)

 

Wellington:        What's wrong, Mr. Attorney?  Why the harsh glare in your eyes...?

 

Maya:               Nick!  We've worked so hard to get this far, but

                        if you don't do something quick, he's going to get off scot-free!

 

Phoenix:           I know.

                        (I know this phone has to be his...)

                        (But how am I supposed to prove something like that!?)

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               Mr. Wright.

                        If you cannot prove who the owner of that cell phone is,

                        your indictment has no basis, and therefore, no power.

                        It looks like you came up a penny short.

 

Phoenix:           (Where...?  Where did I go wrong...?)

 

Wellington:        Don't blame yourself, you're merely a third-rate lawyer.

                        You only made one big mistake.

                        Who are you?  What are you?  That's something you haven't figured out for yourself yet.

 

Phoenix:           (Who... I am?)

 

[gavel-whack]

 

Judge:               The court hereby concludes the cross-examination!

 

Wellington:        Heh heh heh...

                        If that will be all, I'll have to bid you gentlemen and ladies goodbye.

                        I have a reservation at that ultra-fancy restaurant on the upper side of town.

 

Payne:              Thank you for your assistance.  You've had a stressful day, so please, bon appetite!

 

Phoenix:           (What am I supposed to do!?  Am I supposed to just let it go at that?)

 

            ---> Wait and see

 

Phoenix:           (It's no use.  I can't do any more.  There's nothing left.)

                        (Nothing left but to go back to my hometown... But where in the world is that, anyway?)

 

Maya:               What are you mumbling about!?

                        You're... Well, you're YOU, Nick!  And because you're you,

                        you can't give up now!

 

Phoenix:           ("If I were me"...?)

                        Alright.  If I were me, then what would I do?

 

Maya:               That's easy!  For starters, you'd raise your voice and object!

 

Phoenix:           (So for now, I should at least say something!)

 

            ---> Raise an objection

 

                        [continue]

 

Phoenix:           HOLD IT!

Please wait, Your Honor!

 

Maya:               Alright, Nick!

 

Phoenix:           I think I may be able to prove it!

 

Judge:               "Prove it...?"  Prove what, Mr. Wright?

 

Phoenix:           Everything!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

Y-Your Honor!  The cross-examination has already ended!

                        If he questions the witness with any more of his badgering...

 

Judge:               You will not harass the witness.  Is that clear, Mr. Wright?

 

Wellington:        Did you hear that?  No harassment allowed, Mr. Attorney.

 

Phoenix:           Please, Your Honor!

 

Judge:               ...

                        Very well.  But this is your last chance, Mr. Wright.

 

Phoenix:           ...!

 

Judge:               You may present one piece of evidence to the court.

 

Phoenix:           (I only get one shot at this!)

 

Judge:               If you cannot "prove" everything...

                        It's over.  For your client, and for you.

                        Do you fully understand?

 

Phoenix:           Yes, Your Hon--

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

I'm sure you are well aware, Your Honor, but the cross-examination period has ended!

 

Judge:               Were you paying attention, Mr. Payne?

                        I said that Mr. Wright could present only one more piece of evidence.

 

Payne:              Oh...

 

Judge:               Now then, Mr. Wright.  This is your last chance.

 

Phoenix:           (It all comes down to this!  It's Go time!)

 

Judge:               Please present the one piece of evidence that will explain everything!

 

            --> PRESENT: Wrong evidence

 

Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

 

Judge:               ...

                        Is this your final answer?

                        It's a bit disappointing.

 

Phoenix:           Nonono!  That was just a friendly gesture!

 

Wellington:        Ha ha ha.  You sure know how to send a friendly gesture to me, at least.

 

Judge:               This is your absolute last change, Mr. Wright.

                        So no more of these "friendly gestures"!

 

Phoenix:           Yes, Your Honor... Sorry...

 

            --> PRESENT: Phoenix's Business Card

 

Phoenix:           TAKE THAT!

 

Judge:               Why, thank you.  How nice.

                        Here, please have one of mine.

 

[Judge's Business Card added to the Court Record.]

 

Judge:               Wait, what am I doing!?  This isn't the time to be exchanging business cards!

 

Phoenix:           Your Honor.

                        There is something very important about that card.  And that is...

 

            ---> the name on the card.

 

Phoenix:           The name on that card tells people who I am!

                                                It even told ME that I'm "Phoenix Wright"!

           

Payne:              ...

 

Wellington:        ...

 

Maya:               ...

 

Judge:               ...Did you not know that?

 

Phoenix:           Nope!

 

Payne:              OBJECTION!

Wh-wh-what's the meaning of this nonsense!?

 

Judge:               Mr. Wright!  Get a hold of yourself and start behaving like a proper lawyer!

 

Maya:               Ouch…  Talk about a tongue-lashing, Nick…

 

Phoenix:           (Urk.  I should probably try this from a different angle…)

 

            ---> the back of the card.

 

                        [continue]

 

Phoenix:           This card is important because of what is on the back!

 

Maya:               Hmm? You wrote your cell phone number on the back, but...

 

Phoenix:           But that's exactly it.

                        Can you please call this number from your cell phone?

 

Maya:               Huh?  Right now!?  But court is still in session!

 

Phoenix:           It's OK.  You'll see.

 

Maya:               OK, if you say so.

 

Judge:               Is the defense preparing something, Mr. Wright?

 

Phoenix:           We are going to call my cell phone now.

                        And then the court will see everything for what it is!

 

Wellington:        O-Of all the idiotic, stupid things to...

 

Phone:              .................

 

Wellington:        Aaagh!

                        Wh-what!?  Why is my phone...?

                        And what is with this stupid-sounding ringtone!?

 

Phone:              ...*beep*...

 

Phoenix:           Mr. Wellington.

 

Wellington:        ...!

 

Phoenix:           Hmm... How strange...

                        I could almost swear that you're holding MY phone!

 

Wellington:        Y-your...

                        AAAAAAAAAAAH!  No, no, no, no, no!  It can't...!!

 

Phoenix:           By the way, before I forget, thank you very much for the lump on my head this morning.

 

Wellington:        Nnnnngh...

 

Phoenix:           I don't think I need to explain any further, except to say:

                        When you went to retrieve your cell phone, you mistakenly took the wrong one!

 

Wellington:        ...Mmgh... Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

                        aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

                        AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAagggggggggghhhhhnnnn!!!

 

------------------------

 

Judge:               So that is what happened.  You were knocked out by Mr. Wellington...

 

Phoenix:           He is a man who lives on his pride and self-image alone.

                        And in order to hide his involvement with the con artists' group,

                        he has become paranoid, and has lost all ability to make rational judgments.

 

Judge:               Hmm...

 

Payne:              Then... Then, Mr. Wright... The phone you're holding...

 

Phoenix:           It's Mr. Wellington's, naturally.

 

Judge:               Speaking of that man, how is he, Mr. Payne?

 

Payne:              Ah, he was arrested and has been taken away, Your Honor.

 

Judge:               Very well.

                        Now then, this court finds the defendant, Maggey Byrde...

 

NOT GULITY

 

[Yaaaaay!]

 

[gavel-whack!]

 

Judge:               That is all.  This court is adjourned!

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

September 8, 2:16 PM

District Court

Defendant Lobby No. 1

 

Byrde:               I knew that the real you would shine through eventually!

                        I am so moved by what you've done for me, sir!

                        Thank you so much, Mr. Wright!

 

Maya:               I feel really bad for Dustin.  He didn't do anything to deserve this...

 

Byrde:               ... It's probably because of me...

 

Phoenix:           Huh?

 

Byrde:               My whole life has been nothing but a whirlwind of bad luck and failures.

 

Maya:               Your whole life?  It couldn't have been that bad, could it?

 

Byrde:               Since I was 6 months old, when I fell from the 9th floor of my apartment building,

                        I've been hit by all sorts of vehicles, gotten sick from all sorts of foods,

                        failed at almost every test I've ever taken, experienced almost every kind of disaster,

                        and never won or even tied at a game of tic-tac-toe!

                        My life has really been nothing but a string of disasters.

 

Phoenix:           That is, uh... pretty bad...

 

Byrde:               Up until I went to college, I was known as the "Goddess of Misfortune".

                        And then, at the academy, everyone called me "Lady Luckless".

 

Maya:               "Lady Luckless"...

 

Byrde:               What's worse is that my misfortune always seems to latch onto those around me.

 

Maya:               What do you mean?

 

Byrde:               When I see someone in trouble, I always try to help...

 

Phoenix:           Ah, that's right.  You were talking about this earlier.

 

Byrde:               It happened again recently, too, sir.

                        There was an old lady, pacing back and forth by the pedestrian crosswalk.

                        I gave her my hand and...

                        before I knew it, we were having dinner at my house.

 

Maya:               ... Oh.

 

Byrde:               I'm sure that Dustin's gone because of me...

 

Maya:               That's not true!

 

Byrde:               That glove didn't even have any sort of special meaning.

                        It was just a present to say thanks for covering one of my night shifts.

 

Maya:               Oh, I see...

 

Byrde:               Everything is my fault!  Dustin's death,

                        your head being all messed up...

 

Phoenix:           Uh, well, I don't think my head is that messed up yet...

 

Byrde:               I'm going to find a new life for myself starting now.

                        The next time we meet, I'm sure I'll...

                        I'm sure I'll have found a whole ocean's worth of good luck by then, sir!

 

Phoenix:           Yeah.  After all, the "Goddess of Misfortune" is only a name!

 

Byrde:               You bet!  I'm gonna make it!  I promise!

                        Next time we meet, I'll only be an "Unlucky Person", instead of a goddess!

 

Phoenix:           Y-yeah!  That's the spirit!

 

Byrde:               Well, Mr. Wright, Maya, I should get going.

 

Maya:               OK!  Good luck to you!

 

Byrde:               Thanks!  You take care of yourselves, too!

 

---

 

Phoenix:           *sigh* What a horrible day...

                        I've gotten my memory back, but things are still a little fuzzy...

 

Maya:               But you're OK, and that's what counts.  You really had me worried!

                        Come on, let's go back to the office.

 

Phoenix:           (Hmm... I'm afraid to ask, but here goes...)

                        So, this might sound bad, but... uh...  Who are you…?

 

Maya:               What!?

                        I thought you said you got your memory back!

 

Phoenix:           (At that moment,)

                        (everything really did come back to me...)

 

----------

 

Detective Gumshoe...

He's someone I've had clashes with in the past during certain cases.

But he's also been a good ally during others.

 

The Judge...

He's a lovable, kind old man who is easily swayed by other people's opinions.

But in the end, he always comes up with the right verdict.

 

...  This person... I haven't got a clue...

He seems to know me, but

maybe he's mistaking me for someone else...?

 

-----------

 

Phoenix:           (And this girl...)

                        ...Maya...?

 

Maya:               You... You finally remembered!

 

Phoenix:           (This is Maya Fey, my assistant.)

                        (That's right... I have so many unforgettable memories about her.)

                        (For example...)

 

Maya:               Earth to Nick!  What's wrong?

                        You keep staring at me!  Don't tell me you've missed me?

 

Phoenix:           Uh, well, yeah I suppose I have.

                        I feel like I haven't seen you in ages.

 

Maya:               Oh?

                        Well, I'm back now.  So it's time for us to create new memories together!

 

Phoenix:           Alright.  Sounds good.

                        (All the phone numbers on my phone were erased by Mr. Wellington.)

                        (I guess I have to start over from the very beginning...)

 

Maya:               Come on, Nick!  Let's go to our usual burger joint!

 

Phoenix:           OK, OK.

                        (Actually, it hasn't even been two months since she came back into my life.)

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

(And that story...)

 

(That story began on one rainy afternoon, two months ago...)

 

Episode 1: The Lost Turnabout

The End

 

 

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